At this point this is only a rumor, but there is a big buzz going around town now that Tolly Carr, the former WXII anchorman that was charged with drunk driving, and killing a man over the weekend has killed himself. Again, this is just the talk around downtown, nothing has officially leaked to the news, only a rumor at this point.
Edit: Rumor debunked, Read Garrett's post below. Unless of course WXII is lying.
"hello, wxii, how can i direct your call" "yes, i have a quick question ma'am" "is it about tolly?" "yes" "he didnt kill himself, if thats why youre calling" "yes, it is why" ":sigh: no, youre about the 20th caller in the past half hour asking about that" "alright, good day" "thank you for calling wxii"
well, if you believe in it... kills pedestrian in drunken haze = goes to hell commits suicide to escape repercussions = goes to hell im not trying to act like i know whos going to hell or that im not, but sometimes its just fairly obvious.
[quote][cite] Beeson:[/cite]well, if you believe in it... kills pedestrian in drunken haze = goes to hell commits suicide to escape repercussions = goes to hell im not trying to act like i know whos going to hell or that im not, but sometimes its just fairly obvious.[/quote]
do you consider yourself a Christian? if so then youd know/think as long as he is forgiven then he wont spend eternity in hell. Come on now, you shouldve known that. All he has to do is ask God for forgivness and he can spend his time in Heaven.
well if i believed there was no forgiveness, i wouldve gave up a long time ago. so yea, i wasnt being totally serious, i know he has the option to do such, i promise. at the same time however, and i dont want to bring on another religious debate necessarily, but actually, i dont believe thats all you have to do. i feel like the amount of sincerity you put into a plea for forgiveness is everything, and sometimes that means actions too, sorry isnt always good enough in my opinion, sometimes it isnt even close
[quote][cite] Garrett:[/cite]i agree, but im just saying, just cause he killed someone doesnt promise his an eternity of hell[/quote] i agree with you. i dont know him at all, maybe this is one night out of his whole life he messed up and hes sincerely sorry.
[quote][cite] David:[/cite]Do you guys think Tolly Carr will go to heaven?[/quote] The "can-o-worms" question. Insert there is no heaven or hell comments below.
In what I hope is an answer to "heaven / hell" questions. I'll answer it this way. I work on the WXII morning show Tolly is/was on. The last time I saw him he went home on a Friday like many of us do ready for the weekend. By Sunday morning life as he knows it (work, routine, future) changed drasticly in a split second, most likely his own fault, his career probably over, worse still a good friend of his in the hospital, and finally the only dread that is more unmeasurable than the one the WXII family has is the one the friends and family of Casey Bokhoven have. While I can't claim to know the depths of Tolly's soul, I can say I know him well enough to know that he would trade places in a second to set things right.............. but he can't. That IS hell. Hell. Not because he lost things close to himself, it is hell because Tolly IS a responsible, hard working person who was climbing the ladder, who loved his job who then made a UNERASABLE mistake over the course of an evening that was supposed to be a good time and a way to relax. God doesn't have to punish him in some mythical netherworld. Tolly is punishing himself.
Hell? It's here. It's now.
Ask yourself how you would set things right if you did this?
Suicide? Suicide is usually a selfish act taken by an egocentric person because THEY have NOTHING to LIVE FOR,... IE themself, and that isn't Tolly. Personally, I think people do ask the suicide question of themselves as a momentary reflection of ego and that's why the UNTRUE SUICIDE RUMOR caught on like it did, because they see a shattered world in Tolly's life and ask so now what for him? The WXII12.COM site had spike of thousands and thousands of hits obviously looking for information yesterday. Is it true? Phone calls reduced an exasperated response like the one above. Not because she was tired of answering the question but becasue the question being asked is about a horrible thought about her co-worker and friend. That is how I ended up here because I heard the rumor started on the web and was picked up on the radio. So I google searched to find a sourse and in that course found this thread and after reading a bit am now taking the time to post a response. In news you have to know the source.
Beeson. kills pedestrian in drunken haze = goes to hell commits suicide to escape repercussions = goes to hell im not trying to act like i know whos going to hell or that im not, but sometimes its just fairly obvious.
If this is truly what you think, pray to your god you are more than human and never make a mistake........... "but sometimes its just fairly obvious."
Please don't think this is some half-ass apologist for Tolly. He messed up. BAD and has to try to make up for the rest of his life. How would you? I'm not a blind faith person who thinks all sins are eventually atoned for just because that idea keeps me warm and fuzzy at night against my pillow of mistakes in life. So I'm not even asking you NOT to judge MY FRIEND, only to place yourself in his unenviable shoes. When the day is said and done he HAS to wear them and that said none of this is anywhere close to being over. Court, possible trial, sentence, all the while remaining stuck in front of the lens that was his career, love, & life, no commercial break for a breather and over arcing it ALL,.... a life he can't give back no matter how hard he cries, prays, or wills it to happen. The hangover that is unending gnawing at the soul.
The one prayer and hope I have had this week that has to do with my belief in what HEAVEN is or may be............ Is that God has a point in all this. That are things yet to come. On this horizon an eventual point for the family and friends of Casey, an eventual point for Tolly so maybe he can help some person or people and maybe even himself. A eventual point for SOME REASON, but how will it ever be enough? It can't can it? As for what heaven IS.......... Casey's HEAVEN already has shone through the clouded darkness by the people who loved him so SO much. We should all be so lucky to be loved like this even if only for a little while. I might be a simpleton but I have to believe that. For him, for his loved ones, for Tolly, For us all.
This post was merely a response, hopefully it sheds a little light on the fact that "all" the people in this are real. TV while helpful in conveying snippets of the story always distorts it a bit. Casey was a real person with unfinished dreams like you or me. Tolly is a person would never would have dreamed of this and not just a fallen "talking head."
I'm not trying to be out of line by asking this or anything, but are there currently any video editing positions available at the station? I've never really been good at networking, but I figured I would ask.. let me know..
Positions available are listed on the website, Left hand column "About WXII 12"............ Your certainly not kidding about the networking thing concidering the the thread.:confused:
Thank you, TollyThread. Everything about this tradgedy has saddened me since I heard the first report on Monday. Anyone with even the least compassion for others should feel bad for everyone involved.
I agree with TollyThread I also fail to see the humor in this. One life ended, one destroyed, two families devastated and a community stuggling to accept the losses. I have to believe that some good will come from such a tragedy. My hope is that it will make people think twice before they get behind the wheel of a vehicle after they have been drinking. Most people I know have driven after drinking at least once knowing full well they shouldn't have. Some were caught and got DWI's while others got by with it. This just shows you how one bad decision can ruin your life and the lives of the anyone unfortunate enough to be in your path. Hopefully in the future anyone faced with this decision will think about Tolly and call a cab.
I work downtown and had heard the suicide rumor as well. I hope that its not true because that would make this more of a tragedy. Tolly, his family and Casey's family are in my prayers.
Let's all remember that everyone makes mistakes and we are all human so we have no right to judge anyone. Lets also have some respect for Casey and his family and not make light of such a devastating event for them.
[b]Update:[/b] I've just been told by a reliable source that this rumor originally leaked from the Winston-Salem Police Department. It was told to me that Tolly didn't actually commit suicide but rather attempted it. I'm assuming that around 9am yesterday the rumor went from "I heard he committed suicide" to "he committed suicide" which might validate the rapid spread of these rumors.
Here is what else I've learned from people within Forsyth hospital 1. Two days ago Tolly was denied entrance to the room of his friend whom was the passenger of his vehicle the night he wrecked. 2. Post suicide rumor, one nurse is reporting to have seen his body at the hospital.
A culmination of reports from bar go-ers and bar tenders confirmed Tolly having tabs at the night of his wreck at the following locations: Started at 4th Street Filling Station, 6th and Vine, Speakeasy, and Burke St. Pub.
I'm not trying to perpetuate anything but this is what is being told to me, so I am sharing since the news, and Tolly will probably not come forward to confirm or deny.
I could be pissed, retort, curse, etc.............. but realizing we just aren't on the same point on a plane with multiple people I'll just simply try to illustrate.
[quote][cite] David:[/cite]Is that movie any good? I haven't heard anything about it but would am willing to put it in the Netflix queue.[/quote] It's really good definitely worth picking up.
I just looked over to where the users online area is and saw "tolly car, wxii, drunk driving, suicide, tolly car suicide" and thought those were ALL new users created just for this thread. Ha.
[quote][cite] Beeson:[/cite]im so used to looking where the tags are and seeing users online, that for a second, i keep thinking tolly carr is on when i go to this thread[/quote] thats in the thread started about the accident :tongue:
what do you think a good caliber of firearm would be to commit suicide. no i'm not suicidal just curious. oh and by the way i am still alive. the night in question i did not have more than 14 shots of tequila. if that man had not wanted to have been run over then he shouldn't have been walking on the street that night. but seriously what would be a good gun to use?
In response to David's comments about where the rumour started:
First of all, Carr's passenger was not a patient at Forsyth Hospital, she was at Wake Forest University Baptist Medical Center.
Secondly, Carr lives in Greensboro, not Winston-Salem, so I'm sure that if he had any reason to be in a hospital (suicide or otherwise), he would not be at one in Forsyth County.
The whole rumour is a load of rubbish and needs to stop now. I've heard folks talking about it for three days now, and most recently by a nearby table full of folks at lunch. If you want to expend energy on any of this, tell folks who are circulating this lie that it is not true.
Still think he should be punished to the fullest extent of the law. i don't care what kind of person he is. My own mother could be in this situation and I would say the same thing.
Like I said before the only people I feel sorry for are the families and friends of the people involved.
to the people that are sticking up for him. Good job, that is what friends are supposed to do, but I can assure you that not many people will turn a sympathetic ear to you on this forum. Just FYI.
what about me ? i worked hard for my career and now it's all gone because of one mistake. tell me you have never made a mistake. and yes please stop the rumors... i have not killed myself. well physically anyway. i guess the people in the triad are just hard on a brother that has an alcohol/driving issue. if i do get to go back to wxii i plan on doing a dwi piece and the dangers of walking on the sidewalk of a street that i'm driving on.
[quote][cite] tolly:[/cite]i guess the people in the triad are just hard on a brother that has an alcohol/driving issue. [/quote]
Well even though you're joking about all of your posts, this definitely wouldn't be true.. I mean, he made it past the Winston-Salem Police Department; he's already dodged the biggest race obstacle!
not all of us "black folks" act a fool sometimes. i am an educated african-american male. i was not acting anything let alone a fool. i was simply attempting to help support the mexican economy by drinking copious amounts of jose cuervo. i was also driving a 1997 ford truck. i drive used vehicles so all the illegal immigrants with no social security cards or driver's license will have a chance to buy all the new vehicles. surely my social philanthropy will make up for one low paid caucasian. i am not joking. just like when i told wilson hey watch me hit this white guy on the sidewalk. just kidding. i couldn't tell if he was white or jewish.
sounds like actin' a fool to me. then again, maybe your blackness should be brought into question, quervo? ford pick up truck? the absence of a fresh edge up? we might have a carlton banks situation here.
I was surprised to see NO byline on the March 15th WSJ Opinion article about Tolly Carr's accident. No individual was named as the author. No disclaimer allowed for the possibility that the opinions expressed were not necessarily those of every member of the Journal’s board of directors, or its staff. The author apparently felt at liberty to speak for every associated with the Journal. Or perhaps the author just didn’t have the courage to be identified with strong opinions. Perhaps the author feared reprisal from some defender of Mr. Carr or of drunk drivers in general.
The tone was one of condemnation and contempt. The clear objective of the writer was to smear and sneer at Tolly Carr. I don’t know Tolly Carr, and I rarely watch the morning news. I am not an impassioned fan. I am simply an observer who finds it distasteful that so many are ready to condemn a man for one unfortunate error in judgment.
The author of “Opinion†failed to consider the possibility that others might bear some responsibility for Tolly’s folly. The passenger who was injured might have been in better shape to drive. Had she offered? The bartender must have noticed Tolly’s condition, or noted the amount of alcohol consumed. Did he or she offer to call a taxi? And what about the slim chance that someone might have slipped a drug into Tolly’s drink? Maybe he only had one beer, but someone intending to harm him dropped in a tranquilizer or a hallucinogen. Maybe Tolly isn’t a victim. But what if he is? And one thing is certain. He is now the victim of some serious invective and one vicious rumor.
There’s a rumor going around that Tolly Carr committed suicide after the incident. I heard it at my office, and I immediately visited WXII to ask if it were true. The report was false. The WXII receptionist said it was a vicious rumor and it should be stopped. I agreed. The receptionist said she’d been receiving dozens of calls. One or two came in while I stood at her desk.
My kids heard the same rumor at school. My attorney friend heard the rumor from her car mechanic, who said he’d heard it from a police officer.
Certainly, finding out that you accidentally killed somebody is enough of a downer to push anyone to the point of despair. But Tolly did not deliberately set out to endanger anyone, and I think it’s criminal to suggest or wish or hope that he would or should commit suicide. That, in my opinion, is evidence of murderous intent on the part of the person who voiced that wish, and all those who echo it.
If the rumor of Tolly’s suicide were true, I’d have wanted to leave my name and contact information for anyone who would have soon be overwhelmed by unrelenting sorrow. I’ve found resources that can help them. In 2001, I lost a best friend to suicide. I very nearly jumped off Pilot Mountain, myself, the day after her death. But I knew my kids would all go down like dominoes, if I tumbled over the jagged ledge. It has taken years to overcome my grief.
Tolly has a chance to redeem the rest of his life. He should. He can turn this failure into a triumph. He can help others make better choices. He should ask forgiveness of the victim’s family and friends. If they are unable to feel like forgiving for a while, their pain is ample reason for withholding forgiveness. But ultimately, they will be able to heal only after their anger has been healed.
Others who wish to condemn Tolly are not doing the world any favors. Mercy and hope should be offered to Tolly and to all whose errors cause grief and pain.
How do I dare to make such a bold statement? I am the survivor of several violent crimes, including three murder attempts by an escaped convict who held me captive in 1979. During one of those attempts, I told my attacker, “If you kill me now, I’m forgiving you in advance.†I survived my wounds and lived to tell my story, and I lived up to my promise to forgive. I didn’t notify police of the convict’s whereabouts, after I got away from him, but I did send him a letter (postmarked in another state from the one I fled to) urging him to turn himself in.
I don’t know if my would-be killer took my advice. I was too busy hiding, and trying to ensure he could never find me and finish the job. But I did not wish him harm. I chose not to live as a victim. I live as a survivor—and a forgiver. I suspect it is too soon to suggest that choice to the family of Tolly’s victim. But I know it is the only way they’ll ever be whole again. To live with bitterness and anger will poison them and all the people close to them. I wish the victim’s friends and family healing and peace. I wish no less for Tolly Carr.
I sent the above long comment to the Winston Salem Journal and was informed that it is standard practice throughout the newspaper biz to post ropinion editorials without bylines when they represent the opinion of the institution as a whole. The editorial department defended the piece, claiming they were not trying to slam Tolly but to offer the opinion that drunk driving is a serious problem, and that drunk drivers should be held responsible for their actions. They said I was entitled to disagree.
I don't disagree, entirely.
I believe drunk drivers have accidents more often than those who are not drinking. I believe drinking increases the odds of having an accident. I therefore believe there should be stiff penalties for drinking and driving. There should be stiff penalties for intentional vehicular homicide. But... I do not believe all drunk drivers are guilty of intentional vehicular homicide when they have accidents that result in death. They are guilty of driving drunk.
While driving drunk, Tolly was involved in a tragic accident. The crime, if he's guilty of it, was drinking and getting behind the wheel. The death-- however tragic-- was an accident, not a murder. I don't think Tolly should be pilloried or lynched in the press or in the rumor mill.
Words are potent weapons. I believe the words of insensitive boors killed my best friend as surely as a gun to her temple wouild have. I would like to see the rumor mill stop trying to murder Tolly with slanderous remarks. He made a tragic mistake. Don't retaliate by killing his spirit through crass and hurtful comments.
[quote][cite] tolly:[/cite]what do you think a good caliber of firearm would be to commit suicide. no i'm not suicidal just curious. oh and by the way i am still alive. the night in question i did not have more than 14 shots of tequila. if that man had not wanted to have been run over then he shouldn't have been walking on the street that night. but seriously what would be a good gun to use?[/quote]
To cause maximum damage use a smaller caliber like a .22, b/c instead of going in and out it will go in your head and bounce around your brain. Now if your going for closed casket, go the Kurt Cobain way with a shotgun blast to the face, Maximum damage no chance of survival.
sorry smolenda, you raise good points and all, but im not really sympathetic of tolly right now. someone else is missing their brother, tolly is missing his job and reputation, i think theres a difference. whether he meant to or not, thats a decision you have to make before operating a vehicle.